Tag: Faith

You’ll find no exposure, tell-all, messiness here. This is a chronicle of my experiences and lessons learned. Put down your tea cups.

In June 2018, I stopped going to church. Here’s the story…

The Backstory:

I was raised in a nominal Christian family. We spent multiple nights a week at church and even pulled double and triple shifts on Sundays. I participated on the youth choir, teen Bible studies, and everything in between – I was a church kid! At the age of 15, I experienced what I knew was the Holy Spirit that brought me to salvation. From there, a genuine curiosity for Scripture and the desire to honor God with my life was born. I went on to serve at a few different churches and Christian organizations throughout undergrad and seminary, and gained a lot of different experiences. I’m a firm believer that God absolutely does not waste times or seasons so, each experience was what I needed and what God would have it to be.

Why I Stopped Going:

Simply put, I got tired. I got weary of the trends that I had begun to see. Environments had become heavy on volunteering and building church brands and weak on explaining the truth of God’s word. I was working hard and serving in ministries but not getting the soul care, teaching, and equipping that I needed. I kept noticing an undercurrent where there was great commitment to pastors and general fandom, but shallow discipleship and biblical study. People had seemingly become only as good as their gifts and agreement, instead of their souls that needed shepherding. So, after aiming to serve and attempting to be the change that I wanted to see; I bowed out. I quietly pulled away to reset, heal, forgive, and understand a little more.

What I’ve Learned:

1. I first learned more of my own hypocrisy and idols. Every accusation against Christian trends in America unveiled my own shortcomings, sin, and lack of prayer. So, now, my criticisms aren’t based on a “they” dynamic but a “we” dynamic, instead. 
2. I had to come to grips with the truth that despite popular teachings, God will always do the exalting. Elevation comes from the Lord; period (Psalm 75). Exalting does not mean clout and popularity; it can really mean fruitfulness and influence in obscure places.
3. Ministry and worship is rooted in love and obedience to God, not just church activities. You can be an amazing servant/volunteer/ministry leader but a terrible or distant Believer.
4. There is a HUGE world out here that’s desperate for Biblical understanding. They want to know that there’s safety in God and truth in his Word. Unfortunately, there’s often no room for their questions in traditional church settings. 
5. Sundays aren’t enough. 
6. The Church is still good and alive and well. Jesus promised to care for his body so we must not try to disconnect in a way that dismisses Christ’s heart for the very Body he died for.
7. Christian community is where mutual sharing and lack in any form is covered is church. That is the assembly of the saints: coffee shops, family dinners, community clean ups, visiting the sick… the Gospel can go anywhere.
8. Forgive! Forgive others and forgive yourself for whatever power and expectation you gave to humans that should’ve only been reserved for God.
9. Fall in love and stay in love with Jesus and his ways, not a favorite prayer warrior, teacher, preacher or artist…because as humans, we’ll fail and disappoint each other miserably.
10. Never make yourself the standard or litmus for holiness. Make your boast in the Lord and keep Christ as the standard for righteousness.